THE VOICES

Oh, Mister Rabbit?

“He wasn’t going to allude me this time. I had set a trap so intricate, clever, and diabolical that even a creature smaller than he would not filter through.

However I apparently failed to consider the rabbits “size when wet” and as the torrential rain continued to pelt my cold damp aching bones I sat waiting to spring a trap that had already sprung.

Those words were presented to me by “The Voices”

“The Voices” awoke me in the middle of a sound sleep and spoke those words for whatever reason I had no idea?

“That’s an answer for Writer’s Block” they said.

What does a rabbit have to do with Writer’s Block?

“It illustrates that you have no Writer’s Block. We give you information.”

Oh, Really?

“That’s right!”

Fine, thank you, it’s a cute idea, I’m going back to sleep.

“You need to get up and write it down.”

I’ll write it in the morning.

“You’ll forget.”

No I won’t…I’ll write it first thing when I get up.

“If you go back to sleep you’ll forget like you always do.”

Leave me alone!

I tried to ignore “The Voices” and go back to sleep but they would not let me. They filled my mind with thoughts that kept pouring in. They extended the article with other information and went off on tangents in all directions. At that point I sympathized with those who hear voices and do evil things.

Not all voices are bad -- my voices are good. They just aggravate me at times.

OK! I’ll get up and write it down.

A few days earlier while walking “The Voices” spoke to me a classic phrase where Stanley tells Ollie the grandest of all adages,

“You can lead a horse to water, but a pencil must be lead.”

When I arrived home I wrote a scene in which one of my main characters attempts to make his horse drink water which fit splendidly into my screenplay.

On another occasion “The Voices” spoke to me while watching re-runs of Frasier.

A scene depicted a great author throwing his recently completed manuscript from the balcony of Frasier’s apartment. As he watched it falling as so much confetti he remarked, “Thank you for pointing out my flaws. If I’d have published that manuscript my reputation would have been ruined.”

Fraiser and his brother stood petrified in silence.

I was tapped on the shoulder by “The Voices” who spied a major lack of a good line by the producers.

According to them, Fraiser should have remarked after “my reputation would have been ruined”

“Ah, yes! And now, because of what you’ve just done, you will be remembered by the literary world as – a litterer!”

What does all this mean? I have no idea? All I know is I am now compelled by “The Voices” to send this to you. Please understand.

Cheers,
By George